Have you ever been a victim of your own thoughts?

If you are not sure, just think about the one or two or 50 nights when you were plagued by thoughts and constant thinking and you couldn’t shut down your mind and get to sleep. Or, you woke up in the middle of the night and you couldn’t go back to sleep.

Yes, indeed, you were a victim of your own thoughts.

 
 

Sometimes I think I am a victim of my thoughts all day long. And I ask myself why I can’t just let these thoughts go. Eliminate them from my mind and move on, move forward, move my thoughts sideways so I can get in front of what I’m my writing.

Okay, so a boyfriend broke up with you, your brother- in-law is a not a very nice person, your neighbor is noisy and annoying. How easy it should be to move negative thoughts out of your consciousness. But it’s not that easy.

Meditation as a Remedy

If letting thoughts go were so easy, there would be no sleeping medications on the market and that would be the end of insomnia. Of course, you can avail yourself of other remedies from the constant mind chatter: the best and the most effective, however, is meditation.

The other night I was plagued with thinking – yes, I was dumped by the ex-boyfriend – and the old story kept playing in my mind: I’m not good enough, I couldn’t make him see that I was the best thing for him since sliced cheese. You know how it goes.

So I decided to focus on my third eye that is right in the center of the brow. The third eye is a chakra, an energy point on the body. I bore into that third eye as if it were a lifeboat for survival. And I did it! I fell asleep – after being up for a couple of hours – and I woke refreshed. Why was I focused on that cad, anyway? It’s over and I’m done with it. Move those thoughts along, let them go like clouds passing.

Emotions and Dreaming

Your thoughts produce chemical changes in the brain. And what scares you the most are the negative thoughts that plague you and deny you peace. Thoughts usually come from emotional issues. Sometimes these emotional issues are very deep in the unconscious, and you don’t have access to them because they don’t surface often.

When you dream, however, if you can remember your dream(s), you will certainly discover what is truly bothering you. I discovered through a dream that I’m still very angry about the breakup with my ex-boyfriend and that unconscious anger keeps me up at night. My dream tied me to the emotional issue.

As a side note, a hint to remember dreams: When you first come into the awakening moment, don’t do anything. Lie in bed in stillness. You are somewhat asleep, somewhat awake, so draw yourself into your mind and see what activity was occurring in your brain during the night. Do this every morning for however long it takes until you begin to remember the dream activity.

Allowing the Authentic Self to Flourish

What’s at stake with all of us is our own vulnerability. When you are emotionally openly honest, there is an uneasy feeling, an uncertainty about life, even a fear about what’s going to happen to you in the future, or the present, or even the past when you made that decision to do or not to do something important in your life. But you are not the all-knowable, so you can’t and won’t carry around self-blame. It’s destructive and produces only more negativity.

It was my son who clued me into why I was having trouble letting go of my ex. He told me that I was afraid to grow old without someone. At 73 year of age, that struck me as honest and true. I had been strolling through life expecting that I would hold a man’s hand and carry his love into old age.

Well, maybe I don’t really want that as my future. Maybe I want another legacy for my life. The negative captured me and, of necessity, to ensure that my authentic self-flourishes, I reconfirmed and reconnect to my journey and I could let go.

If you are a victim of y our own thoughts, you are hiding in fear – fear that life won’t turn out the way you expected, fear of failure, fear that dark forces will take over your life. For as Brené Brown, renowned sociologist, author, and motivational speaker tells us in her book, Daring Greatly, we can dare greatly if we get a glimpse into vulnerability. Examine the path of your negative thoughts and shine the light on removing the mantle of being a victim, at least until tomorrow.

Here is the formula: Meditate for 10 minutes, manage your thoughts, maintain your balance with good physical, emotional and social activities. It works!

Do you ever find that your fears or negative thoughts hold you back? What techniques do you use to find balance and acceptance? Have you tried meditation? Please share in the comments.

Joan-Frances-Moran---100pxJoan Moran is a keynote speaker, commanding the stage with her delightful humor, raw energy, and wealth of life experiences. She is an expert on wellness and is passionate about addressing the problems of mental inertia. A yoga instructor and an Argentine tango dancer, Joan is the author of 60, Sex, & Tango, Confessions of a Beatnik Boomer. Her new book, I’m The Boss of Me! Stay Sexy, Strong & Smart at Any Age, is now on Amazon. Check out Joan’s website joanfrancesmoran.com and follow on Twitter @joanfmoran.

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