Are You Feeling Older Than You Really Are?
Is your age showing? Are you anxious that you are acting older than you are, or feeling older than you are, or are becoming irrelevant or invisible?
Please, relax. You are only showing your age if you buy into the clichés of aging. If you are, it’s time to let go of your fears and anxieties. It’s time you turn your life into an enjoyable journey where you are the featured player, where you develop ideas about living joyfully and expansively in the future.
Transitioning to 60
All well and good, but It seems that in your 60s you encounter a few magical, mystical hormonal changes that alter your mental, emotional, or physical state.
At the same time, the depletion in your neurotransmitters encourages an increasingly negative mindset. You think, “Wow! I’m over 60. I’m hitting 70!” – and you imagine that your life will suddenly be different, not as wonderful, not as awesome.
You can either decide to hold on to your unfounded fears about aging and buy into to the cliché of limiting life experiences, or you can get better with age and acknowledge that there are other ways to expand your ideas about aging.
I’m still 19 in my head. I don’t entertain chronology. As the years go by, I get more conscious, more energetic, more inclined to take a risk, and single-handedly determine my intentions and goals. What’s good for me means that I’m becoming the person I always should have been.
Living from a Deeper Place
What makes my life delicious now, as I turn 75 this year, is that I am more in tune with myself. I’m not being another version of me.
I’m living life through a deeper place inside of me. From that deeper place comes an appreciation for time that is not defined, for change that is meaningful, and for self-reflection that brings knowledge, understanding and wisdom.
Lighten Up on the Negative Aspects in Life
Stop thinking that aging is associated with sickness, death and dying. Have you noticed that as people age, there are many more references to their aches and pains, and the aches and pains of others you don’t know?
Sharing endlessly with friends, neighbors and even strangers about the experiences of others related to negative states – physically, mentally or emotionally – is enervating.
You hear more about funerals, more about friends or relatives in the hospital with difficult issues, and more about who is losing their hearing, balance and memory.
Of course, you will share health issues and deaths, but keeping the exchange of information brief, with concise brush strokes, will illicit empathetic responses that are appropriate to the situation.
It’s natural to live with opposing forces in nature. However, sharing too much of the negative stalls the process of getting back to positive energy, and doesn’t directly contribute to a healthy, wise and productive life.
My mother never complained, even into her 90s. If she ever had an ache or a pain, I never knew about it. She was always young and spirited. Rarely did she talk about death. She left all that to the powers that be in the universe. I want to be like my mother.
Learn to Be a Free Spirit
You are born to be free. Did you see The Book Club movie? In real-life, the age of these actresses ranges from mid-60 to pushing 80. Most of these beautiful ladies hover around 70.
They read the sequel to the book 50 Shades of Gray, Fifty Shades Darker, which prompts them to open their minds and hearts to take risks and live large.
The novel is the jump-off point that inspires the women to look at their individual situations from different perspectives. As a result, each of them decides to expand her options and possibilities and remain positive with their choices.
Aging with Grace and Imagination
There is no doubt that aging takes courage and commitment, and above all, aging takes grace – the grace of knowing yourself. That’s real liberation! That’s a no guilt approach to living.
Consider that aging with consciousness should be your life’s work. And be careful not to fall in to negative traps that will steal your joy.
To age well also takes imagination. Where do you want to travel? Who do you want to go with? Plan one big vacation a year, then do puddle hops during the rest of the year.
Develop ideas of favorite travel. Central Europe, Cuba, Vietnam, the U.S. The list is endless. Think gypsy! Think explorer. Learn to say yes and experience something new.
The most egregious way to show your age is being mired in the past, repeating the same things over and over again, being stuck in quicksand that limits your thinking.
Moving forward in life is the way you stay young and maximize your human potential. It involves gaining intelligence, knowledge, emotional growth and life experiences.
Combining imagination with the freedom to think and dream elevates your ability to respond to complex situations, define problems, project possibilities and outcomes, approach new situations with confidence, and develop coping strategies.
More importantly, you will get out of your comfort zone and challenge yourself. You will be able to take risks, grow, transform, develop new skills, take chances, and defy stereotypes and misperceptions.
What kinds of ideas do you have to stay young and vibrant? How effectively do you disengage from negative thinking? Please share any tips you have learned about that can help us stay positive in life.
Joan Moran is a keynote speaker, commanding the stage with her delightful humor, raw energy, and wealth of life experiences. She is an expert on wellness and is passionate about addressing the problems of mental inertia. A yoga instructor and an Argentine tango dancer, Joan is the author of 60, Sex, & Tango, Confessions of a Beatnik Boomer. Her new book, I’m The Boss of Me! Stay Sexy, Strong & Smart at Any Age, is now on Amazon. Check out Joan’s website joanfrancesmoran.com and follow on Twitter @joanfmoran.