New Year’s Resolutions for Mature Minds: Set Concepts, Not Lists
While home visiting my family over the holidays, my sister mentioned a few of the resolutions she’d set for herself this year.
They included doing more fiction writing (and, specifically, being willing to endure 100 rejections), upgrading to varifocals so that she doesn’t need to hold a book within an inch of her eye to read, and a handful of other standard-issue resolutions.
“What are your goals?” she asked.
I paused to think it over.
“Thanks for reminding me,” I answered. “I need to set my concept for this year.”
In Defense of Vagueness
As someone with a fairly strong Type A personality, it’s tempting to use the beginning of the year as an excuse to set even more goals for myself than I normally would.
But a few years back, I resolved that I wouldn’t do that anymore. Instead, I decided to embrace the idea of setting broad, overarching ‘concepts’ to frame the coming year.
I’m aware of all the advice out there claiming that you need to set specific, actionable objectives if you want to get anything done. I’m also aware of all the research suggesting why, if you go too far down the measurable outcomes path, you might end up abandoning your goals altogether.
To that end – and, let’s be honest, what good is research if you can’t cherry-pick the stuff that suits your needs? – I have anchored my defense of conceptual resolutions in a Stanford University study entitled “In Praise of Vagueness.“
Because of the way the brain processes negative information, this article suggests that we are actually better off motivating ourselves through a general principle (e.g., “I’d like to be more fit.”) – or through an acceptable range of desired outcomes (e.g., “I’d like to lose between 5-15 pounds.”) – than tying ourselves to one specific number ( e.g., “I need to lose 10 pounds by June 1st.”)
The basic idea is that presenting information in a vague way allows you to sample from the information that’s in your favor and choose the part that seems achievable or encourages you to keep your expectations upbeat. That way, you are motivated to stay on track.
Choosing a Concept
But I didn’t really start embracing conceptual New Year’s resolutions because of what the research said. I did it because I thought it would help me to bring greater coherence to the many different hats I wear, both personally and professionally.
I felt that having an integrated, ‘catch-all’ concept would make me feel more comfortable being pulled in so many different directions. I also thought having a concept would encourage me to think more creatively about the different aspects of my life and how they fit together, rather than thinking in siloes.
So, for example, one year my watch word was ‘authenticity’. That was all about bringing my personality out more in social media (principally blogging and Facebook), but also about choosing to read books that illustrated other people’s journeys toward self-discovery.
Another year, my watch word was ‘change’. That year, I knew in advance that I’d be laid off for my job and that I needed to be open to trying out different career options while I took time off.
Yet another year, I embraced slow living.
This Year’s Resolution
This year’s resolution, you ask?
It’s about balance. Not just the professional balance yielded by a portfolio career. And not just work-life balance if all that means is not being a workaholic.
But work-life balance in the sense articulated by author and entrepreneur Robert Glazer, which he defines as follows:
…”an understanding that each day or week might bring different combination of things to attend to at work or in your personal life, but they total a portfolio of quality experiences. It’s not about the time itself, it’s about being fully present and engaged in each of the pieces…”
I like that idea. Balance as being fully present in each of the pieces of my life, whether that’s teaching or coaching or writing or swimming.
If you could pick a concept for 2019, what would it be? How does it describe a need in your life and how would you attempt to approach it? Please share below.