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Yikes, I Need a New Sofa at Age 82

By Ann Richardson April 19, 2024 Lifestyle

When I was young, I used to think that things sort-of worked out in the course of a life. I mean things, like your pots and pans and your cutlery and your living room furniture.

I imagined you bought all this stuff when you were young and then they were just ready for throwing away around the time you died.

It doesn’t seem to work out like that.

Buying When You Are Young

I grew up in the 1950s, where the contented suburban housewife was the prevailing image. It was easy to imagine the newly married couple all nicely set up in their newly bought house with lots of shiny new household goods given to them for their wedding.

But I never really thought about what happened after that. When was anything replaced, if at all? Like the fairy tales where people get married and live ‘happily ever after’, the ‘ever after’ for all their stuff never gets told.

In any case, this scenario didn’t happen to me, as my husband and I were very poor (two graduate students, after all), had a small wedding and didn’t get huge numbers of presents.

When we moved from our initial furnished apartment into an unfurnished one, we had to make do with a lot of hand-me-downs from my parents, putting ‘throws’ over somewhat dilapidated armchairs and the like.

I guess that should have told me something about what happens when you are somewhere in the middle – you can hand down your old furniture to your children and buy some new stuff.

And as my parents aged, I could see their furniture – and everything else – becoming a bit shabby. It didn’t seem to matter much. Much more interested in matters of the mind, they were not super house proud. Some slightly old furniture, the occasional stain on carpets and chipped coffee cups were not so serious.

Setting Up a House

At some point along the way, my husband and I moved from the US to London and, after renting for a year, we bought a house. Indeed, we bought two houses seven years apart – the second being where we continue to live almost 50 years later.

And we had to furnish these houses with all sorts of stuff, including a living room suitable for ourselves and for guests. Which we duly did.

We always tried to do everything fairly cheaply, as we were in academic jobs and did not earn much. There was no moment of splashing out on things.

Just after we moved into the larger second house, my husband saw an ad for leather furniture at a considerable discount. He had the bright idea that if we bought this, it would last well and would therefore be much cheaper ‘in the long run’.

I didn’t much like leather furniture, but I could see his point, and we bought a sofa and two chairs in a rich brown colour. I tried to soften them with bright cushions, pictures on the wall and a nice carpet on the floor.

The Long Run

And now aged 82 and 83, I think we have reached the famous ‘long run’. The leather furniture did last. And last. All this time.

We thought we might have downsized by now, but somehow that never happened.

So here we are with the same sofa and armchairs. Only, they are cracked here and there and are looking very shabby. I put thick tape over the worst of the cracks, but that only highlights the predicament.

Indeed, when we invited our energetic 18-year-old grandson with three of his friends recently, we decided we didn’t dare sit them in the living room because they might tear the furniture accidentally ­– and we didn’t want to embarrass them.

What to do? I think our only choice is to buy new furniture. Which we won’t be using for all that long for obvious reasons.

We can afford it but are loathe to spend the money. We try to be frugal more than ever, so that our children – and, more importantly, our two grandchildren – will inherit as much as possible.

The youngest generation will be facing a mountain of debts, with rising university and housing costs and the more we can save toward them the better.

And, not surprisingly, it doesn’t stop with a new sofa and some armchairs! Everywhere I look, there is need to update.

Are we the only household where the husband argues that a few holes in his undershirts or pyjamas don’t really matter?

Growing Old

There are many aspects to growing old and many of them I like. The need to buy new things is not one of them ­– and I suspect everyone has seen older people ‘making do’ with what they own.

It’s a pity one cannot buy things with a built-in obsolescence rate calibrated to your own decline. Then, things would sort-of work out in the course of a life (as I wished at the outset of this piece).

People like us wouldn’t be faced with the need for a new sofa.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Have you had to buy new things at a late stage? Was it a pleasure to have bright new things or an annoyance at the need to spend the money at this point? Do you keep some things, like clothes or anything else, well beyond their time?

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Donna

I remember my grandmother buying a new couch in her 80s

Col A C Poswal

Amazing. Good. My furniture is also as old as me and never thought of buying one. After reading this article, I must buy it. Convey my thanks to the writer. Regards

Grateful

Good write-up. I look at my furniture and I know 5 to 10 years, upgrades are inevitable. I am a single lady at 60, I understand the budget implications, I just imagine I will have the cash then… I live in a cash economy.

Sara

Finances are also an issue for me and I understand how you feel. I know there are many options such as Facebook market place and such but I am not totally comfortable doing it although I have sold items on those sites. One does not always need to buy brand new:)

Nancy

When I remodeled my condo five years ago, I sold most of my living room furniture and a few other items on Facebook marketplace. That saved money to help pay for a new sofa, swivel chair, coffee table and end table. I purchased a dining room table & chairs, a bookcase, a bedroom vanity and a very nice marble and wood TV stand from Facebook marketplace. I completely gutted the kitchen and purchased all new cabinets, countertops and appliances. I replaced the tub with a walk-in shower and designed a new bathroom vanity. I also Bought a new bedroom set. Luckily, I paid off my mortgage in 15 years, so I was able to get a home equity loan to help with some of the remodeling. I am 69 years old and may not need to purchase new furniture in the future. However, as I live in a third floor condo, I may need to move to something ground level in a few years.

Boxer Mom

We are getting ready to downsize, and I am looking forward to getting rid of my torn leather sofas, banged up office desk, etc. Yes, we are saving for our children/grandchildren, but I look at this way: instead of all of them having to come into our house when we are gone and get rid of tons of old ripped up things they will never want, they can come in and get nice, updated furniture that can be for their own use. So that’s giving them money through a different outlet with nicer furniture and not making them get rid of all the garbage they don’t want when you are gone. Plus, it’s nice to be in a home surrounded by things that make you happy, not torn, unattractive furniture. And if you shop around online or in person, you won’t have to spend tons of money on new furniture. Just my opinion! :>)

Jane

Boxer Mom, I downsized, too. This meant I needed smaller furniture. My children are also minimalists so I doubt anyone wants my stuff. It’s all in good repair.

Tracey

You should get new stuff that you like enjoy and is functional for your lifestyle! But please know this…your relatives will more likely than not…not want your stuff when you pass, I have gone through this plenty of times helping people declutter homes after moving a parent to assisted living or their passing. Do it for you now but don’t think they will want your stuff it will be sold at a huge loss or donated.

Tanis Day

It seems a happy problem, and beats the alternative as my Dad used to say. After all, you have outlived your sofa! I would suggest bargain shopping through Facebook marketplace or Kijiji, or an equivalent second-hand website. People often get rid of good furniture at low prices online. It may already be a bit broken in, but usually is in pretty good condition of it wouldn’t be worth listing. Or maybe take your Grandson shopping and let him weigh in on what he thinks he wants to inherit in the far off future! In any case, have fun with it! You have earned the right to get something you like!

The Author

Ann Richardson’s most popular book, The Granny Who Stands on Her Head, offers a series of reflections on growing older. Subscribe to her free Substack newsletter, where she writes fortnightly on any subject that captures her imagination. Ann lives in London, England with her husband of sixty years. Please visit her website for information on all her books: http://annrichardson.co.uk.

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