Dating on Valentine’s Day: Yes or No?

Oh, February 14 – love it or ignore it! It makes me think of the movie Love Actually, and all the types of love in the world – romantic, unrequited, familial, love across languages and races, love despite status, love after death, brotherly/sisterly love… and so much more.

Remember, it’s a Hallmark holiday. February was most likely a dead retail month – and this day invigorated sales: candy, flowers (A friend of mine who works with UPS told me about the planes full of flowers being flown in from South America just for 2/14!), perfume, anything pink or red!

No Date on the Horizon for Valentine’s Day?

No worries as a first or second date can be majorly weird and stressful with all the media attention this day gets… so unless you are in relationship, it may be an uncomfortable date.

As a top dating coach, I always have clients bring this question up to me, and they start asking in January!!!

My advice? Stop thinking about it, and once we hit Cupid’s Day just unplug. Don’t look at dating sites or social media all that day.

Other Tips for That Day

1. Do something your ex hated. For example, order that Indian food he complained about.
2. Take the Love Language quiz online – hey, it’s free and fun. Plus, you’ll know what some people are talking about on their profiles!
3. Thinking of a new volunteer endeavor? Check out some options.
4. Hit the cosmetics counter at Nordstrom for some retail therapy and see what’s new. Time for a new fragrance or a free makeover?
5. Research a trip you’ve been thinking about since Covid.
6. Get a facial. You’ll feel like a million bucks.
7. Plant an herb window box with mint, basil and thyme – yum, fresh muddled cocktails at home.
8. Repair a rift. Remember that dumb fight you had with your brother? You love him – so tell him.
9. Bake something sweet and deliver it to your awesome neighbor. Don’t bake? It’s Girl Scout Cookie season!
10. Work out with a great new cardio playlist you made today. Oh, those endorphins.

Love of All Kinds

February 14^th is just a day – but a day filled with all sorts of love, not just romantic. And we all love someone, right? Pick up your cellphone and call someone you haven’t spoken to in ages. I’m thinking of my favorite aunt who recently lost her husband, so while I think of her often, today I’m settling in for a good long chat with her.

Another fun idea for Valentine’s Day is “Galentine’s Day,” a celebration with you and the “gals.” Over the past 10 years, this has turned into a real thing: ladies getting together for a golf day, a spa day, a shopping and lunch day. Now, doesn’t this sound fun and easy to put together?

But If You Just Started a New Relationship – Go Low Pressure

On the other hand, I have clients in new relationships – mostly in the one-to-three-month range. What do I tell them?

For instance, Jeff, 64, met Anna two months ago, and they’ve been seeing each other twice a week. He really likes her and asked me what was appropriate. After some brainstorming, he is taking her back to the place they first met – for lunch and has a small gift for her, a book they’ve chatted about as she loves to read.

Another example is Tim, 67, who has been dating Laura for a month. They are both super athletic and avid pickleball players. He’s planning a pickleball date with another couple, then invited her back to his home for his favorite Italian dinner (Yes, this man can cook!). He’s planning Pasta Carbonara, Caesar Salad, Tiramisu (no, he’s not a baker – he’s buying that) and a good Chianti.

Laid back is the way to go for Valentine’s Day in the early throes of dating. I have one client in Asheville, NC planning a hiking date and another client in Sarasota planning a bike ride followed by lunch. Wow, people seem athletic this year, don’t they!?

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What was your best Valentine’s date ever? What made that date special? If you’re not currently dating, what special thing are you planning for 2/14?