Already retired or thinking about retiring? Once we are over 60, most of us likely fall into one of those two categories. No matter which one you are in, I encourage you to ask yourself if there has been a whisper in your mind that you have been ignoring?
Dr. Caroline Leaf has a podcast that I listen to regularly. I find it really hits the nail on the head as I help individuals with retirement planning. I find that some folks have no difficulty turning the page when retirement starts and others do. Dr. Leaf points out that sometimes what shifts everything (retirement or otherwise) doesn’t always require a massive breakdown, it can be a little whisper.
When you start to pause and think about retiring or what you want to do now that you are retired, she reminds us that the pause is not indecision, it’s intelligence. Awareness creates the shift that brings you into a state of “malleability” which means your brain can be re-wired and so your situation CAN be changed. It makes sense to be aware of and listen to whatever your whisper might be telling you.
Sometimes one of the most helpful things you can do, whether it’s related to retiring or a relationship or a job, etc. is to admit that it’s time to do something new. That takes courage. Yet it’s really no different than the analogy she uses of watering a plant. You stop watering a wilted plant and choose to redirect that water to something with roots.
A common denominator for most life changes, a move, a new job, etc. has at least some financial component to it. I would love for all women to take the emotion out of their financial life by treating it as a checklist to be taken care of and then moving on to enjoy the fun and meaningful aspects of life once that financial checklist is complete. Retirement is no different.
We all enjoy more peace of mind when we know the financial aspect of our life is not a worry. Thinking about and taking action on pre- and post-retirement aspects of our finances is no different. We are all ready for different steps at different times, based on our individual circumstances, so I’ve developed a variety of retirement checklists to get women started on whatever they need and are ready for in the moment.
Depending on our childhood and our past relationships, acting on the financial tasks may come easily or not. Even though I am in the financial industry, I see over and over again that it is the “mind” aspect of our behaviors (not just financial behaviors) that we most often fail to realize is in control.
Dr. Leif is a Neuroscientist, and she does a great job of reminding us that our mind is in control, not our brain. Our mind thinks, feels, and chooses how our brain rewires. So walking away from something, retiring for example, is a disruption that we can choose how to “start over.”
Even when the retirement decision isn’t always our choice, we still have choices we are in control of. Research continues to confirm that about half of Americans end up retiring 3-5 years earlier than they had anticipated. Most often that is due to uncontrollable factors like health issues or job loss from employer changes.
Our mindset should not be about erasing who we have been but about updating what no longer fits and adding some new learning/growing opportunities. I overheard two women talking the other day about retiring. One had retired four years ago, and the other, two days ago. They were discussing the difficulty of letting go of the worry about who would replace them after they left. The former encouraged the latter to let that thought go sooner rather than later as it was no longer in her control.
So I think the best news for all of us to remember is that our brain does not think. It just responds to your mind. And you are totally in control of your mindset. My wish for you is Less Worry, More Life! I challenge you to get the financial peace of mind behind you so you can focus your mindset, time and energy on the enjoyment of the new learning and growth opportunities that await you in retirement.
What have your retirement thoughts or experiences been like? Any mindset shifts you are experiencing or found helpful or challenging? How about any tips for women thinking about retirement or already retired? Let’s share!
Tags Retirement Planning
I’m in the midst of planning for retirement, the everyday nuts and bolts part. My late husband and I planned for “our” retirement so long ago and I kept chugging along after life threw us a curve ball and he didn’t make it to retirement. It’s scary going this alone, I wish he was here so we could share our retirement dreams that have been dashed. I am ready mentally, just getting over the fear of actually taking the big plunge.
So sorry you are going into retirement unexpectedly by yourself, not the way you were looking forward to it. I hope you can embrace other women in your life to help you jump into this new but now different adventure as I’m sure he would want you to.
Retirement is such a big decision. For my husband it was simple, he was done (4 years ago). For me, I just wasn’t ready. Mid June I semi retired, went as a floater and filled in for vacation relief. Well life has a way of making decisions for you. I had ankle surgery Oct 6, so I officially retired Oct 3. I can concentrate on my rather long recovery and I look forward to the birth of my 4th grandchild at the end of the year.
Love the way you said that Paula, “life has a way of making decisions for you.” Always good to have your intent in mind but to also be flexible and aware that life is always full of surprises!
I was ready to retiré emotionally at 55 but could only do it financially at 64. IIive on.my own but with a decent income. What I do.know is this. Family and health come first and by the time we’re ready for revirement, we might be really tired or worse not in good health. This is à huge factor in retirement as it can become more difficult to be dynamic as you age.
Thank you Jane for that critical reminder. It’s a challenge to balance work with family and health!