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Feeling Lost in Your 60s? Here Are 8 Tips to Get Back on Track

By Rachel Lankester October 02, 2022 Mindset

Do you ever feel a bit lost? Are there days when you lose your sparkle and question who you are and what you’re doing? Do you sometimes feel irrelevant and that you don’t have much to look forward to? It’s so easy sometimes to get stuck in a negative spiral, isn’t it?

I’ve been there myself, and I know how hard it can be to get motivated again. Especially as we age, in a society that doesn’t exactly value older people.

One of the reasons I set up The Mutton Club was to try and change the narrative around women in midlife and beyond. I want being ‘mutton’ (ref. ‘mutton dressed as lamb’) to be something to be proud of, not ashamed.

All our lives, women are fed the narrative that we get to midlife, and it’s all downhill from there. And that’s so not true!

I genuinely believe that the older we get, the better we get. And I’m passionate about getting that into women’s heads. But how can we help ourselves when we have a dip in confidence? Here are my top tips I find useful every day, especially when I’m feeling a bit lost.

Don’t Believe Society’s Narrative About Older Women

You can create your own narrative in the same way you create your own life. Be proud of who you are and where you are in life. Be proud to be mutton – it’s a far tastier meat than lamb after all!

Don’t Believe Your Negative Thoughts

Just because something exists as a thought, doesn’t make it true. It’s taken me a long time to learn that but it’s really good advice. You can actually change your thoughts like you change your socks. Positive affirmations can be very powerful, too. We can rewire our thought processes if we change our internal narrative patterns.

Don’t Judge Yourself

Be as nice to yourself as you would be to a friend. If your friend was down, you’d probably give them a nice nurturing positive pep talk, wouldn’t you? Well, do that to yourself. Talk to yourself the same way you’d talk to your friend.

Visualize Yourself Being Confident

See yourself in a scenario where you’re excelling. A few years ago I thought this was complete mumbo jumbo, but I’ve found it’s actually very powerful.

I’ve learnt that professional athletes do it all the time. They visualize themselves standing on the podium with the medal around their neck. A bit of positive self-talk can do wonders. Don’t think, “Oh, I can’t do that.” Think, “I can’t do that YET.”

Try Not to Misinterpret

Check what you think you heard. Could it have been meant differently to how you heard it? Or read it, if a message or email – those can be so easy to get wrong!

Try Meditating

I’m not as disciplined as I’d like to be when it comes to meditation, but I’ve found it very useful for getting me back in the moment and grounding myself. Even five minutes a day is worth doing. There are many meditation apps you can use, such as Headspace (paid after the first 10 days) and Insight Timer (free).

Start a Gratitude Journal

I don’t journal very regularly, but when I do, it makes a big difference to how I feel. Taking some time each day to write down the things we are grateful for is another good way of grounding ourselves.

It could be as simple as, “I’m grateful I woke up again this morning!” Or “I’m grateful to have orange juice for breakfast!” Just keep it simple. But it helps to reframe our experience of life.

Try Setting Yourself a Challenge

It’s easy to get down when we have no sense of momentum. Setting ourselves a challenge, however small, can be really helpful.

I’m an uninspired cook, so setting myself the challenge of baking a cake would be massive. Even compared to my first half marathon last year! I don’t know what it is about me and baking, but it brings me out in a cold sweat! Still I know magic happens outside the comfort zone.

I hope these tips may help. Always remember, if you’re feeling a bit lost, you’re most certainly not alone. It can happen to all of us. Be kind to yourself and remember: time is a great healer.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What do you do when your mojo is monkey decides to go for a walk? Do you have a list of activities that help you out?

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T Mitchell

After mounting and winning an age discrimination lawsuit, I went back to school and used my course capstone project as the foundation to build multiple tourism businesses 2018-2022. One business projected 3 million year three in revenue. I banged on every door in my state. Nobody was interested and nobody was supplying funding.

I took a year off and returned to low paid journalism. I quit after 6 months, strung along for four months for a university job I didn’t get. Now finishing month three of providing free consulting to a university sponsored tourism conference.

Now semi back into the tourism biz via work on this conference, turned up two businesses in region that got awards and funding. One business pilot got the funding for their project from the SAME org that turned me down last year. Both businesses are a combination of what I built five years ago. That group are all white men: brewery owners.

I had an executive in the SBA system in my state tell me in 2019 that I was experiencing sexism. I couldn’t believe it.

None of this does me any good. I’m out of money, the government players are all the same people and I’m so depressed I don’t get out of bed. On top of all of this, I spend 80 hours a month in care giving chores for my 86 year old mother and receive no money or support from my crappy siblings. I’ve cut my toxic brother out of my life. Required.

If I’m not depressed, I’m angry to degrees I feel like bashing walls in. I did everything right. And nothing is helping. And nobody is supporting anything I do. I expect I didn’t get that job due to my age AND the cronyism in my state.

I give up.


Great to have found this site!!! Looking forward to more.


I got laid off at 50 and the next 10 years has been a disappointing career implosion. Years of unemployment, trying to fit into jobs that I should never have taken, bad luck, death of my mom, trying to create success with my art and/or creative skills as a VA, all the while being needed to help support my son who is in the spectrum. I honestly feel like a failure at the working/career part of life which seemed to slowly crumble once I became a mom and went part-time. Now I’ll be 60 in less than 3 months, my Etsy shop has gone from my best month in December to zero this year, I’m afraid to try to get a job which isn’t easy now due to the economy, and my self esteem is shot. Sorry for being so negative but it’s where I’m at.

The Author

Rachel Lankester is the founder of Magnificent Midlife, an online hub celebrating and empowering women. She's the author of Magnificent Midlife: Transform Your Middle Years, Menopause and Beyond, host of the Magnificent Midlife podcast and editor of The Mutton Club magazine. She helps women create magnificent next chapters.

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