Memoir: Why Writing Your Personal Story Can Be the Ultimate Reward

Over the last decade or so, memoir has grown into one of the most popular reading genres. But the truth is, personal stories have been part of the human DNA for a very long time. We have been telling our tales to each other for centuries. But in modern times, more and more of us are taking on the task of writing our own personal narrative. And why not? We all have stories to tell.

The Memoir Boom

In the age of social media and blogging, revealing ourselves to the world has become a daily habit. It seems, as a society we are less and less intimidated by opening our hearts to share our most treasured experiences, and sometimes our biggest heartbreaks. Telling our stories has never been a more culturally popular, even significant thing to do.

A few years ago, the National Association of Memoir Writers came into being. It was inevitable, it seemed, because so many of us have wanted to learn how to write our stories, especially for those growing older.

Linda Joy Myers is the woman behind the association. She believes memoir is a very human act that can leave a legacy, heal a difficult past, and even offer “revived faith in the human condition.” And this may be especially true when the years remaining are fewer than the years that have passed.

Your Story Doesn’t Have to Be Fantastical

I teach memoir classes, and many students wonder aloud about whether their subjects, their themes, their stories are too mundane. “I don’t have anything interesting to write about,” one student said to me not long ago.

Nonsense.

Students invariably believe that memoir or a personal essay must be about some grand moment – climbing Mt. Everest, sailing the world’s seas, overcoming a major tragedy, enduring a devastating illness. These themes can be compelling, but many times the smallest of things make the biggest impression.

Personal narrative, when it makes the most impact, is many times about a tiny observation. The smell of lilacs. The autumn leaves on the ground. The morning snowfall. A quiet prayer. A walk in the woods.

To write a personal story, one does not have to write an entire book. Start small and remember that connecting with the reader is about sharing experiences that we all can relate to – a memorable holiday, a difficult loss, a frightening medical incident, a child’s first birthday. All of us can find a story in themes like these.

Small Moments Tell the Big Story

Years ago, I was privileged to spend three months as the Writer-in-Residence at the Jack Kerouac Project in Florida. I often sat on the home’s front porch in the late afternoon, and nearly every day I had a visitor. A green anole, a cousin of the iguana. I named it Chuck. It came out to greet me regularly.

I could have written about so much more – bigger, deeper subjects – while I was there. There were plenty. I was living in a legend’s old home, where he had written one of his masterpieces, The Dharma Bums. But instead, it was a small thing – that little green lizard – that intrigued me. And so, I wrote a short personal essay about Chuck, about the conversations the two of us had, about Florida in the summer, about community, the creative life, about solitude. Chuck was my jumping off point for so much.

The key is to remember that the small story is what delivers the biggest impact when you find the connection between your personal moment and the bigger human condition.

The story of an individual’s very human experience is valuable and worthy. And it can be taken to the level of true art, but only when the writing goes beyond the self, beyond navel-gazing, and connects to what we all share as human beings – our fears, our delights, our sorrows, and our joys.

Your Story Is Important

It’s necessary to tirelessly encourage the writing of personal stories, of individual observations, of one’s singular reality because it is essential. We need these stories to feed our souls. They are crucial. Humans have been telling stories to each other since the caveman days, since gathering around campfires. It is what we do.

The stories that reveal our inner lives are acts of grace, like tiny prayers that connect us to the divine. The stories spur understanding, kindness, tolerance, no matter how long ago they took place, no matter how tragic or how joyful they may be. We do not survive without human connection, and telling our stories is not only fundamental to our existence, but also vital.

The poet W.B. Yeats is believed to have said, “The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” Whether the quote is attributed correctly or not, it is certainly something Yeats would have undoubtedly believed in. And for all of us writing personal narratives or hoping to, we should never allow our senses to grow dull for they are the receptors of the world around us, the first responders to our personal observations. Sharpen your senses and write what they reveal to you, because what you have to say is magic.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Do you have the habit of writing down personal stories? Are they major events or deeper thoughts? Do you write for yourself or to leave a legacy?