Navigating the Threshold of Transition with L.I.F.E.         

Your life is a STORY of transition. You are always leaving one chapter behind while moving on to the next. Some chapters are audacious and breathtaking. Some chapters are full of unspeakable joy and happiness. Others… well… not so much. There are turbulent chapters that leave you feeling like you’re in the eye of a tornado and there are chapters filled with sorrow and sadness. As mature women, we have transitioned through the ups and downs of life and we’re still standing!

When you really think about it, you start transitioning from the time you’re conceived. You transform from an embryo to a child to an adult. And ultimately, we all transition out of this world.

We All Transition from and to Something Else

Life transitions are periods that involve significant changes to your lifestyle. Over our life we start school, we get married, some of us get divorced, and most of us will change jobs.

Most, if not all, of you reading this have experienced a major life transition sometime in your life.

Many of you have experienced a major life transition that has PERMANENTLY ALTERED your life.

I know I have!

Some transitions we can prepare for. Having a baby. Retirement. Moving.

And then there are those transitions that KNOCK you upside the head. Being suddenly DOWNSIZED or even FIRED from a job. A health crisis that hits you without warning. A spouse who walks in one day and says he doesn’t want to be married anymore. And, in my case, having lived in Southern California most of my life, an earthquake can literally transition the ground underneath your feet.

Transitions Consist of These Three Shifts

Keep in mind that 3 shifts must take place in any transition:

• A Mindset shift
• A Heart shift
• An Action shift 

When I think about transition, I think about life – L.I.F.E. Let’s take a deeper dive at that word LIFE for the next few minutes.

L – LET GO of Your Need to Know the Outcome

Hey, I know it’s scary to let go but practicing present moment awareness stops us from writing a detailed mental screenplay of how things will turn out.

Let go by ditching the what if’s because WHAT IF they don’t help you?

LET GO of the physical baggage in your life: During your transition, clean out closets and cupboards! Get rid of artwork that doesn’t ignite your soul and clothing that doesn’t make you feel like a rock star. In other words, STREAMLINE your life.

I – IMAGINE the Best Version of Yourself on the Other Side of Transition

You get to CHOOSE who YOU want to be on the other side of your transition! Nobody else. You have the FINAL SAY over your goals, dreams, and decisions. IMAGINE yourself COURAGEOUS because courage breeds confidence.

F – FREE Yourself

One way to free yourself is by doing what the Italians call dolce far niente – the sweetness of doing nothing. During your transition, take a few moments every day to do absolutely nothing ­without guilt and without anxiety – just sit still and breathe!

Another way to Free Yourself is by firing non-supportive people in your life – those who don’t celebrate you or your journey. And then after you fire them, FORTIFY the relationships that are VALUABLE to you, STRENGTHEN your relationship with those who DO celebrate you and your journey.

You Free Yourself by forgiving others. This one can be a tough one. I’ve had plenty of practice forgiving, especially family members. My dad grew up with nothing and died at 79 years old with a six-million-dollar estate. My mother died two years later in 2014 but not before she and my sister met secretly behind closed doors with the attorney and stripped me of my portion of my dad’s estate.

When I learned of the betrayal it felt like a sucker punch to my gut and a right hook to my jaw. I didn’t have some big, fat 401(k) waiting for me during retirement. The inheritance WAS my retirement. To say I was outraged at the time would be an understatement. My attitude stunk at first.

But… slowly over time… I CHOSE to transition through the process of forgiveness and finally release an expectation gone terribly wrong.

Because you see, transition isn’t just about moving to a new city or starting a new job. It can mean shifting to a new state of mind. Look, there’s no way around it, forgiveness is hard, but it’s the most significant way to free yourself.

E – EMERGE as the New You!

What do you want your life to FEEL like on the other side of transition? What heart adjustments will you make? What new ACTIONS will you take?

I’ll leave you with this, dear ladies. No matter what, honor your transition journey. Give yourself the kudos you deserve for still standing. And the next time you’re standing at the threshold of transition, remember to live life, L.I.F.E.

Let Go. Imagine. Free Yourself. Emerge.

Questions for Deeper Thought:

What major transition left you feeling so heavy that you thought you’d crumble under the weight? How did you navigate through it? How have you prepared for transitions you knew were coming? Move? Job loss? Children leaving home?