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6 Reasons We Need to Explore Our Sexuality After 60

By Perley-Ann Friedman August 19, 2022 Mindset

Exploring our sexuality after 60 is not a joke. Society may laugh at the idea of people over 60 being sexual, but we are. We may not be the same as we were when we were younger, but we still have emotions and desires. After all, we are human.

Many women over 60 are sexually active, and there are many who would like to be. Because of the negative stigma associated with sex for seniors, they suppress their desires. This is to avoid the judgement of others.

These “others” are probably much younger. They don’t want to think about anyone older than them, especially their parents or grand-parents, having sex. Remember when we were teens and the idea of our parents ‘doing it’ was just awful! It was creepy and something we quickly put out of our thoughts.

Things are changing. We may be getting older, but we’re getting better. We’re healthier, more active, and more involved in society than previous older generations. We are aware of our bodies, and most of us do what we can to maintain a healthy lifestyle. Sexuality isn’t taboo for older people like it used to be.

Grace and Frankie Normalize Sex After 60

The terrific Netflix show Grace and Frankie focuses on senior sexuality. The storyline, as you probably know, centers on the importance of accepting our sexuality, whether gay or straight, before it’s too late. The episodes explore sexual pleasure and same-sex relationships. It also talks about making ‘lube’ for older women and selling personal massagers. This innovative and provocative series has opened up sexual doors for boomers. It’s giving us the green light to explore and acknowledge our sexuality.

Here are 7 reasons why we need to explore and acknowledge our sexuality over 60:

Exploring Our Sexuality After 60 Is Natural

We are sexual beings, nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about. It doesn’t matter that we’re older, and it’s okay that our sex drive is changing. To ignore it just isn’t healthy, mentally or physically. It helps us to deal with uncertainty in life.

It’s Time to Be Honest with Ourselves

We need to ask ourselves what we like, want and desire from a sexual perspective. Maybe we don’t care. Perhaps the last thing we want is sexual activity. But maybe we’d like to be aroused, or have sexual fantasies.

Some single women may have decided that the sexual part of their lives is over. But it’s okay to have desires and fantasies, even when you’re single. Being honest with ourselves is important as it gives us strength and improves our self-awareness.

Being Sexually Aware of our Body Feels Good

Put your favourite outfit on and look in the mirror. Do you like what you see? Does it make you happy? Do you feel like you can turn heads? It feels good to think about our sensuality, our passions and our desires. Our thoughts can be enjoyed in the privacy of our minds, without any negativity or interference from others.

It’s an Easy Way to Improve Our Lives

When we are aware of our sexuality we can explore how to satisfy our desires. There are many ways to feel sexy, desirable and satisfied. We can begin to date casually, date younger men, explore gay or lesbian relationships or get a personal massager. We can even search out erotica in the form of books and movies.

You may even want to ‘wake up’ your partner to once again enjoy sexual activity. Knowing what you desire, helps you improve your life.

Sex Is a Great Way to Relax!

It’s well known that sexual activity is wonderful for stress relief. Even when we’re alone, we can daydream to satisfy our desires. Self-stimulation is also a super way to relax and achieve sexual satisfaction, especially when a partner is not available. We may find we’re sleeping better, feel more refreshed during the day, and are better at handling life’s ups and downs.

Why Not?

What’s holding you back? Sexual exploration can be private, discrete and extremely personal. You don’t have to tell anyone if you don’t want to. You may find you’re smiling a lot, feeling happy more often, and there may even be a swing in your step and a twinkle in your eyes.

Senior sex is here to stay. It is growing more and more popular as seniors embrace their sexuality. Grace and Frankie are empowering older women and men to be honest about their sexuality and desires.

Bravo to Jane (Fonda) and Lily (Tomlin) for their excellent portrayal of strong, independent and sexy women. We need to listen to this message and embrace our bodies without embarrassment, without humiliation, but with pride.

Do you feel better and less stressed when you embrace your sexuality? Have you watched the Netflix show Grace and Frankie? Do you think that it’s important for all of us to explore our sexuality after 60? Please join the conversation.

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Catherine Shores

For one who wrote about recapturing sexuality, only ended up with cats?

Catherine Shores

I am divorced, childless and 62. I saw the series and senior centers are far from my plans. I am divorced 26 years, but celibate for another decade. I am drawn and still attracted to younger men. I found shaming on dating age gap social media, thinking the prime age for a “cougar” woman in her peak sexuality when she hits 40, not 60, then no one. I was also race shamed for being called a wrinkly white woman by another mixed-race woman of 40 marrying a 27-year-old younger man. I quit dating sites, as I got noticed by senior men, 60 – 70+. After nearly 30 years without any sexual encounters, I feel dreadful to end up in the algorithm. I had felt much more chemistry and passion with younger lovers.

The Author

About Perley-Ann Friedman, The Happy Cat. I now live on Koh Lanta, a small island in southern Thailand. I am enjoying my alternative lifestyle as I ease into retirement. I’m in my 60s, healthy, active, have red hair and totally love cats. I’ve consciously chosen to be positive and to continuously grow as I journey through life. Visit me at http://thehappycat.ca

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