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I Never Ever Will Move Again! The War Cry from a Home Under Card Board Boxes

By Leslie Ginnes February 19, 2023 Lifestyle

About three months ago, my moving across the country to be closer to family became more than a topic of conversation. It became a reality; reality in that theoretical, I don’t want to think much about it, fact. March, for some reason, was picked, probably by me, to be the month to move. I probably picked it because it was very far away from December.

Moving closer to family was the categorical answer to why I was moving. That very few asked why I was moving or where I lived anyway was the real reason – a different topic for a separate post.

But please know, I put no one else but myself and my life in the crosshairs of my now very active, present, moving prep reality. Also, it was never a lie; I was moving toward those I love and those who loved me.

Why We Move and Does That Help?

As with most, there is so much backstory to that statement; it could be designated a national treasure for all emotional archeologists to enjoy. But that is not the point of this particular piece either. This is about moving and its 3rd or 4th position on the agreed to list of the hardest things to do and approved by “THEY” or “THEM,” whose gig it is to create such lists.

Context is essential when attempting to express an emotional metric. My professional expertise and my personal passion fall smack into the home décor, space design, and nesting world. Finding a pillow, a carpet, and a blanket that play so beautifully together elevates my euphoria to the level it was on August 15th, 1991, at the Paul Simon Concert in Central Park.

I can testify through modern medical studies of my brain that I am as far from linear as you can. My brain does not do rote. And those who are linear survive the beast of the move best.

Apparently, a part of the human brain understands visual context far more than previously thought and yet cannot be aligned with a great architectural designer’s gift.

Moving + the brain = confusion.

Our Personal History of Moves, Does It Set Us Up?

February 24th, 2023, will mark my 2nd transcontinental, 2nd coastal, and 3rd interstate move in 5 and half years, yet moving is anathema to millions of other humans and me. For whatever reason, it is a multi-cultural, cross-gender, income-straddling mud-slugging experience.

And for those who like to move, I cast no aspersions; you probably feel as misunderstood as those who do not care to eat spaghetti.

Moving is the dismantling of your life, slicing through the layers laid down. This layered delicacy is your place, your space, your pattern of living, and the familiar light, with the sights, sounds, and scents of home. It is memory and texture and future and past forming Home.

Home is space, more often the place that stores unique memories, both good and not, relevant to you and yours only. Moving is between a Russian smashing a glass down with shards flying up and an arthritic seamstress picking apart threads that make a seam to render a garment or pillow back into fabric.

See if you can imagine a robin or bluebird in spring taking down from the corner of a porch the tireless work put into that perfect niche, removing all of the gathered twigs and down, outdoor dust bunnies, and seedling bits. With their beak, they toss hither and yon where the eggs would lay.

Yes, if they don’t want the nest, they will probably leave it, but it only demonstrates the perspicacity of birds and the concept of how ugly it is to dismantle one’s home. Bird brains rain supreme in the moving world.

Hiccups, What Things Went Wrong; Can You Do the Perfect Move?

I am in week 2.5 of what I consider the month of the move. Yes, I am aware it is not March. I have photographed all items to be sold online, found a new place to live and lost It, found another place to live, actually two, and sat still, with bated breath for the ruling to come on “You’ve won a home; a place to lay your head,” and I am not buying. That is another story.

I have movers in place, packing help lined up, have flight across a country secured, a hotel to stay in the night before, a buyer for the car, and a new car on the other side. I should be in giggles of glee.


Selling online these days came with bouts of fraud, scams, and outright theft. Apartment hunting is not close to enjoyable because there are a limited number of blinds from which I could stalk my prey of an affordable two-bedroom with in-unit laundry, and the permit to go after what I want is bloody expensive.

The third credit card kept for emergencies such as freezing and closing my other two accounts is now camouflaged, hidden within the massive pattern of stuff, boxes, tape, and the fallen heroes of paintings and art; and where the heck is my phone now?

Moving Growth: Everything Teaches Us Something

Last evening, I soothed myself as I sat with a cool glass of wine and leftovers heating in the microwave with the sure and faithful knowledge that comes from age and experience: this too shall pass. A new space that will hold me and mine with warmth and beauty. Everything that is like freshly baked bread will happen. But I know it is itching at the back of my brain; I forgot something significant.

I realized when I woke up this morning what it was I forgot.

I forgot what the linear brain does without firing a second neuron. Put on the packing list, pick up every day, pull it out from the back of the closet, and take out all the hidden places it lives… Patience! Boxes and van loads of patience.

And to have fun imagining the new life that is about to start.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Do you dread moving, relocating, packing stuff, selling, repurchasing new things, and all the other activities related to changing your home? What do you find is the hardest part of moving?

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OMG..I am going thru the same chaos and bewilderment and for the same reason…to be closer to loved ones…yuck…getting older, needing to be near …it’s gotten so complicated to sell and move and yes…memories..good and bad…one half of me wants the deal to fall thru and the other half..???


Yes, moving is right up there with taking the LSATs. And the unknown can be frightening. But it can also be filled with promise. I subscribe to the latter. Especially if my new home is in a city with a great library system 😉


I am 70. I have moved 22 times in my adult life. Now I am seriously considering a 23rd move across two states to be near my oldest daughter. I am excited to explore new territory and be near my daughter, but I am dreading the actual move. I am really getting too old for this. Sorting, throwing out, Just making those decisions makes my head hurt! Of course, since I haven moved so many times, I have less stuff than a lot of people my age. Then it is the thought of moving away from close friends and all the known, Drs, hairdressers, church, stores etc. Starting all over at my age plus a brand new state is a little mind boggling! When I was 33 I moved myself and 3 young children across 5 states, but I was heading back home. Since I have moved out of this state twice and back. But, I have no family here anymore except a few cousins I never see. I don’t want to wait until my daughter has to do it all for me. I am flying out there in early June to scout it all out. Hoping to make the final decision and come home and move! Wish me peace in my decisions!

Beth Rice

Peace ☮️

Lana Muir

The hardest part of moving for me is “saying good-bye to what is familiar”. I am the Christopher Columbus in my family – single with no children. Moving is exciting for me – I love everything about it. Getting rid of stuff, hosting garage sales, down-sizing, getting ready for a new neighbourhood, new city, new country. I give myself lots of time to prepare for the move – six months to a year. This takes 99% stress out of moving. Honest.


That’s a great idea , Iam planning a mo e closer to family after a very abusive emotional dating with no marriage partnership. I’ve taken over a year to heal and still working g on that, Iam raising g a six year old granddaughter since her birth at 61. I am so anxious to leave this place I’ve been in most of my life with many good memories but actually more of them are bad. Iam nervous because I have lived alone now for awhile and haven’t dated and not sure I am ready to just yet if ever. So moving near my sisters is exciting and yet a bit worrisome as they are all in long term marriages . Thanks for this pist Iam going to give myself until late July as Iam doing this all on my own with two fur babies and a six year old but somehow I manage and the best thing is there’s no o e telling me how to do it so I can make mistakes and just do my best!


It will be exciting moving starting over fresh, it doesn’t matter that your siblings are in a long term relationship, I’m 67 only one that divorced in my family of 4 other siblings, they are your support team, and guidance and family for your grand 6 year old, consider this a new adventure for the both of you.

Cindy Stults

I appreciate this article. I will soon be 61 and just made the decision to move back to the Midwest from the Southwest, where I have lived for nearly 17 years. I do dread everything you mention but I am motivated by a desire to be closer to family and by fear, because where I currently live is very expensive and I cannot afford it. Today is the day I begin looking for a new job, because I will have to work for a long time yet. Once that is in place, then I begin searching for a place to rent and the rest of it. I am grateful for this contact: it helps so much to know we are not alone, even though we oftentimes believe we are!


Your not alone and I am in very similar circumstances at 61. I also have survived a very emotionally abusive relationship of sixteen years dating a Man that was a Narcassist so Ive been solo and healing for 15 months now and it’s been a struggle but also a blessing. I look forward to Sharing a walk a coffee just the company of my sisters and also getting g out of such harsh temperatures and high costs here in Alaska. Thanks for your post it let’s me know how many of us warriors are going through this!

The Author

Leslie Ginnes’ goal is to freely share the expertise and care given to her, which nurtures her creativity. She is 65, looking back and looking forward and wondering how we can lift what is too heavy to carry. Finally, accepting everything will change, and it does in a split second.

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