It’s hard to believe how fast this year has gone, and we are officially launching the holiday season –Hannukah, Kwanza, Christmas, New Year’s and more! Here come Lifetime and Hallmark movies with happy endings.
But, the hustle and bustle of the holidays can be happy for some, and tough for others. A recent break-up. A loss of a loved one. A lonely time for some. And of course, a happy time for others.
So, as a dating coach, my clients ask me – it this a good time of year to date?
Here are some of the tips I give them:
In December, daters, in general, are in a happy mood. Many take time off and have more flex time. Dates can swivel from the normal drinks or lunch date to walking through a Christmas market and attending holiday parties with your date. It’s funny that the things people do this time of year they wouldn’t imagine in March – ice skating, long walks in cold weather with a smile on their face!
On the other hand, you may be inundated with family and friend obligations, travel, shopping and other things occupying your time and find you have not time to date. Don’t over commit – enjoy this time of year however feels best to you.
So, there’s a bit of a yin/yang in #1 and #2!
As I mentioned earlier, this is a fun time of year. If someone you dated earlier in the year invites you to a party – GO! You never know who you might meet there. It’s a wonderful time to increase your social network. In my 25+ years of coaching singles, I can’t count the number of times love bloomed at a party. So, accept as many invitations as you feel comfortable going to without overdoing it.
Last year, my client Diana (64) went as “friends” with an online date to his golf club holiday party. Wouldn’t you know it, she met an acquaintance of his and the last thing I heard it was a happy relationship.
Don’t overspend! That’s an easy answer for those of you dating someone over the 4, 5, 6-month mark, right? But what if it’s a month or two, and you’d really like to show your enjoyment and appreciation of this person?
A book by an author or on subject matter you know they’d enjoy, a scarf with their favorite team’s logo, and hey, what about a nice batch of fudge or a favorite holiday sweet you enjoy making? They all show thoughtfulness and are not over the top.
The holidays have a way of sweeping us along a faster pace than usual; we are more social in general, etc. But that does not mean just because you started dating a man 6 weeks ago that you must introduce him to your children and family – it’s a new relationship!
It probably feels the same to you – are you ready to meet his daughters and newborn granddaughter whom he’s so excited about? There will be plenty of time for that in the New Year if things work out.
Alcohol consumption goes up by 27% during the holidays according to Pew Research. And, who wants to be slurring words on a date – or listening to your date over imbibe?
I find reflecting on one’s goals a helpful practice once or twice a year. As yourself, Am I on track? Do I know what I am looking for? Am I putting the effort in? Just some food for thought as we ring in 2024 shortly.
Happy Holidays, my friends!
Are you being social this holiday season? Have you thought of this: What a great time to get some fun candid photos for your online profiles in the New Year? Is dating a New Year’s resolution?