They say women after a certain age should wear their hair short. That long hair past 50 is too much, too youthful and too heavy. Too… something. Maybe too shocking that women our age can actually still be sexy and sultry because we don’t have a sell by date despite what the media would like us to think.
With regards to my long locks, I say to the stylist: “Too bad, I’m keeping mine. And not only am a keeping it, I am extending it with luscious long extensions that fall past my ribs.”
At my age I’m not here to follow outdated rules about what women should look like. I’m here to feel like me – and for me, that means long, healthy hair that flows, swings, and makes me feel vibrant, and, if anything, I look and feel better than I did in my 30s.
People often assume that once you hit midlife, you’ve got to chop it off, go grey, and act your age. But I am acting my age. I’m acting like a woman who knows herself. And I know that my hair is part of my identity, it’s not just a style, but a statement.
There’s this persistent myth that women need a drastic change once they hit their 50s. The pixie cut. The salt-and-pepper look. The muted wardrobe. And while there’s nothing wrong with any of that if it makes you feel fabulous, I resent the idea that it’s the only acceptable way to age gracefully.
So many women feel the need to chop their hair above their shoulders to keep it neat and tidy, to blend into the background and don’t make a fuss. For me, grace doesn’t come from conforming. It comes from confidence. And that includes the decision to keep my hair long, shiny, and dark.
Let’s get one thing out of the way: I’m lucky. I still have dark hair with only the occasional silver strand trying to peek through. I touch up my roots every couple of months, not because I’m hiding, but because I enjoy the ritual. It’s self-care, not self-deception.
And maybe I have genetics to thank for some of it. My dear Poppa had jet black hair into his 80s. He passed on more than just great hair, he passed on a belief in taking pride in your appearance and doing what feels good for you, not what the world expects.
I think about him every time I brush my hair and remember him brushing his hair back in front of the hallway mirror every time he prepared to step out of the house.
Our hair carries so many stories. For many of us, it’s been a silent witness to our lives, pulled back for school runs, let down for date nights, tossed up for long workdays, and carefully styled for celebrations. Why, then, should we give it up just because someone decided we’ve aged out of long hair?
Long hair isn’t about clinging to youth – it’s about honoring your own narrative. Every inch tells a story. Every strand represents your strength.
The unspoken rulebook for women over 50 is outdated and, frankly, boring. We’ve spent decades learning to love ourselves, fight for our worth, and show up authentically. Now we’re supposed to shrink back, soften up, and stop being too much? No, thank you.
I believe in rewriting those rules. If you want silver hair, rock it with pride. If you want purple streaks or a bold buzz cut, go for it. But if, like me, you still feel most like yourself with long, flowing locks, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
One of the best things about being over 50? You’ve stopped needing permission. From anyone. You wear what you want. You say what you mean. And if long hair makes you feel strong, sensual, elegant, or just you, then you owe it to yourself to keep it.
Confidence doesn’t come from fitting in. It comes from showing up as yourself, fully and unapologetically. I even wrote a book about living your truth, You’re Going to Die So Do It Anyway and embracing your style your way features very strongly. There are no style rules for us. We can do what we want.
Let’s be real: Long hair does require a bit of maintenance but it’s worth it.
Here are a few of my go-to tips:
At the end of the day, I’m not keeping my long hair to prove anything. I’m keeping it because I love it. Because when I look in the mirror and see those dark, shiny strands, I see a woman who’s lived, laughed, loved, and learned.
I see someone who’s earned every bit of her confidence, and I feel sensuous; I see people stare at me in either confusion or admiration and I love it. So, if you’re over 50 and wondering whether it’s okay to keep your hair long,the answer is yes, it’s more than okay. It’s beautiful. It’s powerful. And it’s yours.
Wear it your way because age doesn’t define you.
You define you.
Also read 12 Best Longer Hairstyles for Older Women and 8 Low-Maintenance Long Hairstyles for Women Over 60.
How do you wear your hair? Have you transitioned to a shorter hairstyle? Do you still dye your hair? Tell us more about your hair experience after 60!
Hi,
I just discovered your site while looking for a new haircut…and a makeover. Ha, ha. I just had major surgery, and anesthesia and meds have done a number on me. Recovery has taken me out of the sunshine and fresh air and eliminated my daily walks. So, now that I’m almost at the point where I get the green light from my doctor to slowly return to my old lifestyle, I need to freshen up. I haven’t colored my hair in months, and some gray is peeking through now. I’m 66, and I too, was blessed with the dark hair gene. I have long hair as well, but I don’t know that it does anything for me anymore. It’s thinning and brittle after the surgery. Your article was very refreshing, and I love your website topics. Just because I’m over 65, I’m not ready to have the younger fashion trends limit my style. I’m not ready to pull the dirt over myself or disappear into a “rest home”…I have a lot of life left to live. But this article makes a valid and important fact so often overlooked by the fashion industry…WE HAVE MONEY. We also have free time (for those of us retired), and that makes us VERY VALUABLE in the marketplace. It’s just a shame that many marketing execs are too ignorant to recognize that FACT.