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The Way to Stop Anxiety (It’s Not What You Think!)

By Jane Kennard April 09, 2024 Mindset

Feeling anxious, nervous, or overwhelmed? I’ve got good news for you! There’s a way to calm down but NOT the way you may be thinking about.

It has to do with… ACCEPTANCE!

Stick with me! Let me explain.

First, Admit and Embrace It

You’re anxious, unsettled and obsessed. You might be lying awake worried, filled with fear. You may be asking yourself:

  • How will I meet this month’s financial obligations?
  • How will I ever manage retirement?
  • How can I cope with loneliness and isolation?
  • How will I cope with this illness?
  • How can I manage relationships with my adult kids?

You are not alone! Many people suffer from anxiety for all kinds of reasons.

According to Forbes Health contributor Jessica Booth, “Every year, millions of Americans struggle with symptoms of anxiety and anxiety disorders… [It is] the most common mental illness in the U.S.” Booth goes on to say that anxiety “can feel isolating, go hand-in-hand with depression and even impact your physical health.” A US Census Bureau’s survey discovered that 29.3% of adults experiencing anxiety were between 50 and 64 and 20.1% were 65+.”

Accepting Anxiety Is Easier Said Than Done!

By nature, when faced with something fearful or negative in our lives, we resort to one of these “F” words: fight, flight, freeze. We immediately want to lash out and challenge the problem. Or we just leave, ignore, or repress the difficulty. Or we become numb and avoid feeling anything.

In other words, we RESIST what’s happening. So, when difficult experiences come our way, we quickly and naturally respond with resistance. But here’s the thing, “resistance leads to suffering because it is essentially an antagonistic way of relating to life,” as stated by Eckhart Tolle and Kim Eng in Resist Nothing.

The more you try to resist the anxiety and fear, the worse it gets until you are totally preoccupied, and it’s all you can think about.

Here’s the Secret… RADICAL ACCEPTANCE!

Rather than denying, trying to forget or get away from the negative experience, your first step is to embrace and accept it. When you truly allow and acknowledge reality and the fear flooding your mind and heart, freedom begins to take hold and ease your mind and emotions.

Here’s a way to accept and let go of the anxiety, worry, and obsession.

  1. Write down words or phrases about what’s making you anxious.
  2. Jot down your feelings about all this too.
  3. One by one, repeat each word/phrase to yourself and ask yourself questions like: Could I let this feeling go? Could I welcome this feeling? Would I rather have this feeling or would I rather be free?

Remember, you always have a choice. Letting go is a decision you can make anytime. It’s up to you.

Acceptance is always the first step to overcoming anxiety. From there you can learn how to manage anxiety and even become anxiety free.

If you’d like to learn more about How to Stop Anxiety, watch my FREE 10-minute video with the exact 3 steps to stop anxiety, right here.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Are you afraid of something in your life? What is it and how does this make you feel? Do you feel crippled by anxiety? Have you found ways to manage your anxiety?

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Lili Anderson

Hello, Jane! Thank you for sharing your wisdom with us. Anxiety can be so crippling, and I will try your ideas.

Pat Meza

Thank you Dr. Kennard for this informative and helpful article. I believe that managing anxiety is a daily activity that includes all three spheres- spirit, mind and body

Jane Kennard

Pat: I’m grateful that you found the article helpful. Yes, managing anxiety is a daily challenge that involves the whole person: spirit, mind and body. Each aspect/sphere influences and interacts with the other. Thanks for highlighting this reality.


Fear and anxiety are two quite different things. This posting does not seem to recognize that..

Jane Kennard

Chris: Thanks for highlighting the role of fear in anxious states. Identifying fears, I believe, is an important foundational step to managing anxiety.

The Author

Jane Kennard PhD, CPC is a Canadian born anxiety coach whose desire is to help women become anxiety free. Her purpose is to support women struggling with anxiety, overwhelm and worry learn how to live anxiety free. Find out more about her “Blueprint for Anxiety Immunity” Program and sign up for a free consultation at

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