Emotional Decluttering in My 60s
As I look back on my life, I can see all the events and circumstances that brought me to where I am now. I am grateful for every situation and relationship that helped me to grow into the woman I am today.
What I have realized is that some of what I have been holding onto no longer serves me, and it is time to let it go. Just like that closet packed with clothes that I no longer wear; it is time to clear some of the emotional clutter.
Letting go can be difficult but when I look at the benefit it brings, it becomes easier.
It Doesn’t Happen All at Once
Just like sorting through that closet, I needed to take my time and try some things on. How does it feel? Does it work for who I am and what my life is about today? If so, I will happily keep it – if not, I have to release it.
I like the philosophy of Treasure or Toss in decluttering, and it helped to ease some of the emotional discomfort I felt about this process.
One thing I seemed to have accumulated a lot of over the years are unhealthy relationships. Those interactions that, no matter how hard I to try to fix them, never get better.
What I have discovered is that abuse comes in all shapes and sizes (physical, verbal, emotional, financial, spiritual). Running the gamut from unkind and disrespectful to controlling and manipulative, it all has the same outcome – pain.
Replace What You Don’t Need with What You Do Want
In the beginning, everything felt like a loss. Now, I look at what I have to gain in the process. Once I removed the anxiety and discomfort, I found peace and clarity.
Gently, I began sorting through my feelings. I evaluated each situation carefully and asked myself – does this bring me joy?
The answer isn’t always clear cut, and relationships are complicated. But if I am serious about improving my life then I need to prioritize what I give my time and energy to.
Aging Clarified What Is Most Important in My Life
After turning 60, I no longer felt like I had forever but, in many ways, it felt like my life was just beginning.
What I didn’t want to do was to waste one moment being unhappy. Life can be short or long, but it is all very precious, and we have to make the most of it.
For me, that means taking the time to appreciate all of the wonderful experiences I have had and letting the rest go.
Clearing what no longer fits feels like creating space for what is yet to come – more joy and satisfaction at this beautiful time in my life.
Let’s Have a Conversation:
Did your outlook on life and relationships change after turning 60? What impact has aging had on your relationships? Share your stories and join the conversation.
Tags Downsizing Your Life
No more giving the benefit of the doubt to others which often times was detrimental to myself emotionally and financially. Now I make up my mind about what is best for me and it seems to work – much happier!
Nice article, I have been thinking about this topic. I am going try to look at what I have to gain instead of what I will lose. Some relationships and holding onto certain things just don’t fit anymore. I look forward to the clarity, peace and less stress!
Me, too. Taking my time sorting out relationships with friends, acquaintances, neighbors, colleagues…….
I didn’t go through this change until I was 70 years old. I had to clean out my relationship “closet”. My sister and her husband, who live outside of Vegas, had visited my aunt for her 75th birthday celebration. My aunt lives 80 miles away from me. Do you think they could have swung by to wish me a happy birthday? I “wasn’t on the agenda”. That really hurt. That’s when I realized that these two had bullied me my entire life! I told her about herself with many, many examples of how she bullied me. I cut both of them out of my life for good. The only way they can contact me is by letter. I’m at peace now.
I’m so so very proud of you, Ladybreeze!
I’m going through the same thing with my sister and two other siblings. They are toxic to me. I finally cut them loose. I’m 66 and can’t take the stress. Part of me feels so bad but I finally have peace
Going into the journey of my 60’s has become a time of real clarity and transformation for me. I am clearing out closets along with the cobwebs in my mind. I no longer do things which don’t serve me or bring me joy. I decided to retire early and just LIVE in the way I have always wanted to. I’ve raised a family while dealing with trauma all of my adult life. Now I am determined to live in the NOW and to live in grace and gratitude.
I love your thinking, Julie! Yes, it all makes so much sense. We all have tried ti make sense of our trauma through life. It may come and go, but we get to start a new chapter, daily!
Keep soaring to that new adventure!
I sometimes have trouble separating the good memories from the negative ones. Still working on that!!
Good for you, Renee! Keep going!
That’s a tough thing to do…..take your time. It will all become clear to you.