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Later-Life Sex! Let’s Go There!

By Cindy Boatman February 21, 2022 Lifestyle

I’m a little curious about your thoughts and experiences regarding later-life sex. Practical stuff, like how often do you want it vs. how often you indulge? What positions do you find most accommodating to your body? On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being “worth its weight in gold,” how do you rate the value it brings to your life?

Also, if you’re married or coupled, do you always accommodate your partner even if you’d prefer to curl up with a good book? If you don’t have a partner, do you take matters into your own hands? Have you given up sex all-together? I know, that’s a lot of questions!

And here’s one more for fun. Why hasn’t some crafty entrepreneur designed a sexy, yet practical, gym-like piece of equipment to use for the purpose of better positioning our ageing (but amazing) bodies for success during sex? Something that reduces stress on joints, compensates for decreased flexibility, and doesn’t trigger foot and leg cramps. Seems like it could be a lucrative endeavor!

Things I Know for Sure

Maintaining a sense of humor is important. The inability to laugh with your partner when encountering certain predicaments that can occur during intimacy can put you at a big disadvantage! Besides, it is reported that a good laugh enhances your oxygen intake, stimulates your heart, lungs and muscles, promotes relaxation, and increases the endorphins released by your brain. These benefits can increase your odds for a satisfying rendezvous.

Let’s talk about room lighting. I’m not suggesting we should be ashamed of the older version of our bodies, but I’ve always preferred low light or candlelight. If you use a lamp and it’s too bright, toss a towel over it. All that said, please be mindful of any potential fire hazard! The truth is, lower light is more forgiving and it can also serve as a confidence booster. It also sets a sexy mood, while preserving the visual elements of intimacy.

Provided your doctor gives his blessing, we all know there are drugs available to help both men and women with sexual problems. That’s all fine and good, but as long as your doctor approves, I vote for a healthy diet and lifestyle, including regular exercise, as your fist line of defense. Exercise is not only good for your sex life, it’s good for your health in general. Here are some of its potential benefits:

  • Reduces stress.
  • Boosts self-esteem.
  • May boost circulation and blood flow.
  • May lead to more frequent and intense orgasms.

Other Mindset Shifts to Consider

  • Let go of preconceived ideas and expectations.
  • Redefine sex as any intimate physical contact, not just penetration.
  • Take a little time before sex to relax.
  • Communicate any concerns with your partner.
  • Get adventurous and have an open mind; try toys if you’ve never used them.
  • Take up a somatic practice like yoga to get more in touch with your body.

Sex Can Be Great, But It Isn’t Everything

If you are enthusiastic and able to continue your sex life as you age, that’s great! There are many benefits in doing so, such as possibly increasing your life span, enhancing physical and mental wellbeing, and the reduction of anxiety.

If you’ve intentionally given up your sex life or never pursued one to begin with, that’s ok too! There are so many wonderful, fulfilling ways to spend your time as you age. Reading, traveling, hobbies, creative projects, volunteering, spending time with friends and family, and continuing or starting a new career, to name a few.

Sex as we age is an intriguing topic to explore, and I hope this article generates insightful conversation within this community. If you’d like to learn more, check out the following link to an interesting and informative article on the subject. Here’s to a happy, healthy love life as we age!

Please join in the conversation and share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences regarding this topic. Perhaps you have a funny story or a few tips you’d like to share? What you have to say may be the very thing that benefits someone else!

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The Author

Cindy Boatman is excited to share her research and personal insights, hoping to help others live their best lives as they age. She is retired, pursing her dream to write, enjoying nature, travel, and her grandkids. She completed a 200-hour yoga teacher training certification program in 2020.

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