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Want to Live Without Regrets? Bring Your Focus Into the Present

By Tamera Layton Grieshaber March 14, 2023 Mindset

I am not one for saying, “I wish I would have…” The decisions that I made through the years, good and bad, made me the person I am today and, in general, I am pretty satisfied with that person. Oh, there are certainly things that I wonder about.

What if mom had let me accompany my friend’s family on a trip to Europe when I was in junior high school?

I did not get to Europe until I was in my 50s, but I did not even know that the offer was made until I was in my 20s. How would my life have been different? Would my life have been different?

What if I had majored in something that I was interested in rather than something that I thought would land me a good job?

I really enjoyed marketing, but studied accounting, which I hated and had no aptitude for. I was the first in my family to go to college. I went so that I could have a better job and not have to work in a factory. Mission accomplished. I never worked in the accounting field.

I wonder, but I don’t dwell on what could have been.

Today, I Ask Myself a Lot of Questions Before I Make Most Decisions

I’m a list person. Pros and Cons and frequently a list of even more questions. This process has clarified one regret.

I wish I would have asked more questions.

Ask for help! Ask why! Ask about the bit that is niggling in the back of my mind!

It is not a sign of weakness or ignorance to ASK. If you don’t understand what someone has said, it is because she has not been explicit enough to help you understand. Do not be intimidated by authority, position, social status, or apparent intelligence. Asking questions demonstrates your interest, willingness and need to learn.

I know my life would have been different if I had not been so afraid to ASK.

It’s Time to Bring Our Questions into the Present

As women over 60, we have an opportunity to follow our dreams. But, before we can get on the path to happiness, we need to learn to ask the right questions. We can’t take anything in life for granted.

By now, our lives have momentum. In some ways, this is a good thing. As women in our 60s, we know who we are. At the same time, unless we question ourselves and evaluate our past choices, we may never get off the tracks that we have laid for ourselves.

If you look back on your life and find yourself saying, “I wish I would have…,” maybe it’s time to focus on what you can change in the here and now instead.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What questions do you have about the direction of your life? Do you ever find yourself regretting any of the decisions that you have made in the past? Or, have you found a way to live in the present? Please join the conversation.

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A Shively

Short and to the point, thanks Tamera. The road not taken can take up a lot of present-moment energy better spent making new choices for the person you are now!

The Author

Tamera Grieshaber is a retired gallery owner, photography enthusiast, addicted reader, mother, traveler of life and the world, and a lifelong learner.

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