Adult Children

I am known for exposing the “elephant in the living room.” Those things everybody knows but nobody is talking about. Not every mother-daughter relationship reads like a Hallmark card, and our culture makes that a shameful secret to bear…

The older we get, the more often we find ourselves looking back and musing on the trajectory of our lives. Did we get it right? Or is there, indeed, one right way? There are many dimensions to such questions, but here I want…

At some point, we women of a certain age start to question how much our offspring really know about us and our lives. All too often the answer comes back, “not much.” We live such fast-paced and overscheduled lives…

Estrangement is widespread, complicated, and harms all involved. Perhaps you have chosen to cut off from a family member out of necessity. Your experience may include abuse, poor parenting, parental alienation, divorce, poor communication…

A recent visit to my daughter’s home and the celebration of Mother’s Day struck a nerve in me. I felt sad (as I have at times before) and wished I had been a better mom to my two daughters. Especially now, as I observe my first-born parenting…

Family estrangement for women in their 60s is more common than you think. More than 70 million people in the United States report experiencing estrangement from family members. For some, estrangement is a choice due to self-preservation…

Estrangement is a depressing affair. Chronic stress, grief, uncertainty, and negative thoughts are involved in this widespread condition. 27 percent of estranged individuals, emotionally or physically separated from one or more family members…

Remember when you first held your newborn? The love that flooded your heart in that incredibly intense moment is wordless to describe. It washes over you and fills your whole being. That love sustains me as a parent. Love is the guide…

Have you ever stopped to think about how very odd it is to have children? It is, when you come to think about it, one of the most peculiar things we ever do. The decision to have children is an enormous leap in the dark, with very little control…

By the time we reach our 60s, we reflect on what we once hoped for with our family. I hear from women that they would grow older harmoniously with their families. It is encouraging and a blessing when this is the case. But many struggle under the shroud of secrecy…