Isolation sneaks up on ya! Has it snuck up on you too?
I had been building my business as an “Influencer” for over 35 years and this year decided to do something differently. However, disconnecting from that business network for a different focus caught me with a sideline surprise.
Hopscotch. We played the game every day after school. We played it on the sidewalks and in the playgrounds outside the eighteen-floor brick building that was our home in Brooklyn, New York. We played as a way to hang out with each other. We were friends. We were friends because we were the same age and lived a floor from each other.
How do we hang out with our friends as adults?
The older I get, the more clearly I see – through my new trifocals – that life really is a give and take proposition, often with equally unsatisfactory results.
We’ve forgotten some of the gentler social niceties in our quick, digital world. Before there was Facebook, we actually told people Happy Birthday to their faces, or we sent them a card.
When was the last time you felt really listened to? Can you think of a time when somebody sat down with you and gave you their undivided, respectful attention? Do you know the feeling of being encouraged to go deeper, to tap into your own knowing in the presence of another?
My friends are getting sick at an alarming rate. No doubt it goes with the aging process. We all get our share of aches and pains but some illnesses are a matter of life and death.
When your friend is diagnosed with a serious illness, what’s the best way to respond?
Despite everything we know about the importance of maintaining social connections as we get older, finding friends after 60 can be a challenge.
When a friend mentions to you that they are now taking care of a loved one with special physical or cognitive needs, it’s easy to underestimate what this truly means. And it quite possibly marks the beginning of the end of your friendship, if you don’t tread properly.
Have you ever found yourself listening to a friend’s disclosure that she was sexually abused as a child? How did you handle it? What’s the best way to receive such news?
Here are some of my ideas, based on my thirty years as a trauma therapist. During that time, I helped women who had been sexually abused in childhood.